Am I a Widow?

Or: How our reactions can surprise us and lead to deeper self-compassion

Something interesting happened recently. As we pulled into a restaurant parking lot, we spotted an old family friend. I pulled up alongside their car and said hello before heading to the “carry out” spots to park. The family friend parked their car and then came to where we were waiting. I rolled down my window and we had a nice chat for about 5 minutes.

It had been a number of years since I had seen them, or even had this long of a conversation. Life does that. So, it was good to see that they were well and to check in on how everyone else was doing. There’s something soothing about seeing people you’ve known for decades and who have known you. Something easy in the familiarity of it all.

But that’s not what was interesting.

What was interesting was that in the middle of the conversation, which was mostly very uplifting, this person paused and solemnly said, “I am sorry,” in reference to my ex-husband’s passing.